Cupcakes and Heartbreaks
by Green Tea Bubbles
Summary: "So let me get this straight. You - Haruno Sakura Miss 'I like to bake cookies and wear pretty dresses' is going to approach Akatsuki - as in the crazy gang Sasuke's crazy but totally hot older brother hangs out with, to ask them to teach you how to be badass?" In which Sakura does so. For Sasuke. Or something like that. AU shenanigans.
1. Pink and Green with a Cherry on Top

**AN:** A little side fic to hopefully push me out of the writer's block I'm getting with TVMF. It's something I haven't really done before in terms of style - I've always done heaps of Sakura Akatsuki Itachi stuff but this is my first forage into the humour AU category with them. Hope you all enjoy nonetheless xx

* * *

 **CUPCAKES AND HEARTBREAKS**

* * *

 **Pink and Green with a Cherry on Top**

"You're crazy."

Sakura shrugs, twirling a strand of pink hair around her finger. "I think I can manage."

Ino eyes her skeptically, gaze moving from Sakura, in her pretty white sundress, to her pink room full of stuffed animals and cute little cookbooks, and back to Sakura.

"You're crazy," Ino repeats, enunciating her words slowly the way people do when they're talking to crazy people.

Sakura stops twirling her hair and the lock falls back down into its place, framing her face.

"I _so_ can," she states defensively. And she _so_ can. So what if she's only seventeen, and the only thing apart from school she's ever done is ballet – and ballet is _hard_ thank you very much – Sakura has always been a determined little girl and what Sakura _wants,_ Sakura gets.

Proof number 1: back in the days when she and Ino had been fighting over Sasuke, who had even as a five year old been the most adorable little thing, Sakura had seemed like the sure loser. Oh no. Sakura, despite her angelic facade, was bloody determined and she had _claws,_ and her persistence had ultimately won over Ino's.

Proof number 2: When Sakura was twelve she had had enough of Naruto and Sasuke's violent antics and decided to become a doctor. A mere three years later she had managed to get the actual Senju Tsunade – that's right, yep, _that_ Tsunade, the famous sannin _–_ to take her up as an apprentice. Well, she called it an apprenticeship. Tsunade preferred to refer to her as 'the brat who shadows me around the hospital'.

Proof number 3: Well, proof number 3 was coming along. In fact, _this_ was going to be proof number three.

Perhaps Ino sees the determination in her eyes because she relents, leaning back against Sakura's fluffy down pillows. Sakura smiles triumphantly but Ino raises a hand before she can say anything.

"Alright," she sighs, "So let me get this straight. _You –_ Haruno Sakura, Miss 'I like to bake cookies and wear pretty dresses' is going to approach _Akatsuki-_ am I getting this right so far Sakura? – _Akatsuki –_ as in the crazy gang Sasuke's crazy but totally hot older brother hangs out with-"

"Yes _that_ Akatsuki," Sakura bristles primly. "I doubt there're any others."

Ino rolls her eyes, swatting Sakura on the arm. And though Ino looks like a defenseless daddy's girl with manicured nails those nails are _sharp_ and Sakura can feel the sting of the scratch.

"Ino!" she scolds.

"Point remains though," Ino continues, blatantly ignoring her, "You're going to approach a group of likely criminals _– criminals_ Sakura! _–_ and ask them to, and this is a direct quote from you Miss Pink, 'teach you how to be badass'."

"Yep," Sakura grins, choosing to ignore Ino's jibe, "And I'm gonna do it right now."

"Hold up," Ino says flatly, grabbing Sakura's arm again and wrenching her back onto the bed before she can go anywhere. "There are so many things wrong with what you just said. Give me a moment 'kay?"

Sakura sighs. Ino's always had a flair for the dramatic, especially in regards to Sasuke's older brother's… interesting life choices. The Uchiha are well renowned for implementing one of the best police systems in Konoha's history, with Sasuke's own father being Commissioner, but, well, as for his heir and the supposed 'golden prodigy'…

Well, Ino was kinda right she had to admit. Uchiha Itachi had landed on the wrong side of the tracks.

But hey, on the other hand, Ino _is_ kinda biased. Her father works high up in government, and with Ino determined to take his spot, she sees practically everyone as a criminal in some form or another. Considering how her best friend may be prone to exaggeration, Akatsuki can't be _that_ bad, right?

"Look," Ino sighs heavily, looking as if she's lost all hope in Sakura, "How are you going to go about doing this Sakura?"

Sakura smiles excitedly. Now, she had a plan, and she was quite proud of it too. It wasn't very badassery at the moment, but she's sure that with Akatsuki's help she'll very soon remedy that.

"Well, I wrote a letter to Auntie Honoka just last week – you _know_ how she is with technology – and she replied just yesterday which, well, inspired this whole thing. She's got the _greatest_ cupcake recipe, and when we were being kids – you know how Naruto would _never_ shut up? – well, when she gave him one of her cupcakes it was like a _miracle_ 'cause he would just do _anything_ she asked – including shut up! – like one time when he-"

"Stop," Ino says quickly, raising a hand and cutting Sakura off before she sighs heavily again. "Am I to assume from all of… _that…_ that you are planning to bribe Akatsuki with… _cupcakes?"_

"Not just any cupcakes," Sakura sighs, rolling her eyes. Ino doesn't get it, does she? "They're Auntie _Honoka's_ cupcakes. You know with the little pistachios in the mix and the cherry on top of the icing? And it isn't _bribing._ God. I wouldn't stoop that low. I'm just… sweetening 'em up a bit."

Ino stares at her for a second before exhaling slowly.

"Sakura," she says seriously, "I'm going to, as your best friend, advise you _very strongly_ not to do this. Remember – Akatsuki – criminals – with Uchiha Itachi – therefore – connections with the police force – therefore – if you're in trouble – you're in _trouble._ "

Ino eyes her heavily. Sakura forces herself not to avert her gaze.

"Okay," she says quickly. "I won't do it."

Ino eyes her suspiciously and Sakura fights to keep a straight face. Finally, Ino relents. "Have you seen Koshida's new clothes line? She released it last week and oh my god I'm disappointed in her because I thought she was a fashionista but the _shirts_..."

As Ino continues on about Koshida's new clothes line, inwardly, Sakura cheers.

Her first, blatant lie to her best friend - _and_ she'd gotten away with it. Not bad, huh?

How's _that_ for badass?

Well, it wasn't _very_ badass, but, she'll work on it.

* * *

As Sakura walks along the street pavement, cupcakes in a tray in her hands, she starts to regret the pink and green icing. Actually, she starts to regret many things.

First of all, the cupcakes in her tray, lined neatly pink green pink green with the cherries on top, are starting to look like Christmas tree decorations. The pink had turned out way darker than she'd planned and now the cupcakes look completely festive red and green, and when it's still _months_ away from Christmas - well, it seems like highly inappropriate catering.

Secondly, Sakura regrets not changing out of her white sundress. Sure, it makes her look _pretty,_ but what if Akatsuki wants to make her go all badass by skateboarding or something? She knows they hang out at the skate park heaps after all. And it'd probably get all dirty quickly too – and dirt shows up quite clearly on white.

 _Furthermore_ , she regrets not making any extra cupcakes for her to taste test – what if they're disgusting? In fact, she could probably write a whole essay on her regrets of today, and it would be a _long_ one too. After all, Sakura is _not_ someone who skirts from her studies – especially not if she's going to become a doctor.

But unfortunately – or fortunately? – there's no time for her to comprehensively address all of her regrets because the skate park looms in front of her, decorated with various graffiti – slogans of all the groups that hang around the park. _Akatsuki_ is there a few times, surrounded by some red clouds, and even _The Swordsman_ makes an appearance – and god, they don't even live here. Does anyone even skate in this park anymore?

And there, just to the side, painted over half an _Akatsuki_ logo, is the word – _Hebi._

Well.

Steeling her resolve, Sakura walks through the gates into the skate park. It's a Sunday, and perhaps that's code for 'not a devious day' because the only group present at the moment seems to be Akatsuki, and of it, only four people are there. And even though she knows Akatsuki is exclusive, it's not _that_ exclusive – there are definitely more than four members.

She can see Uchiha Itachi sitting casually – or as casually as an Uchiha can – against one of the ramps. Sitting on top of said ramp is another Akatsuki – this one with bright orange hair and multiple piercings, a cigarette between his lips. In front of them both, standing up and animatedly gesturing, is a blonde – long hair – Deidara, Sakura recalls. Sasuke had always quite hated him. And the last is standing off to the side, silver hair glinting in the sun as he polishes his pocket knife.

They look kinda creepy, but more than that, they look _very_ badass.

 _Okay_ , Sakura thinks, _I can do this. This is a public place. They can't kill me here. Even Uchiha Itachi's connections wouldn't get them out of such a public murder._

So she marches confidently up to the group, making sure to stare intently at them so they get the message that _yes,_ Haruno Sakura is actually approaching Akatsuki with a tray of cupcakes in her hand.

Uchiha Itachi sees her first, his gaze casually sliding from the enthusiastic Deidara to her. His gaze is strong, but hey – Sakura's known the dude, albeit from a distance, for more than ten years. She's used to it. Totally. Was it like this a few years ago too?

Seemingly sensing his loss of attention, all the other members of Akatsuki turn to stare at her.

Dang. If she'd thought Uchiha Itachi was intense, now there were pretty much _four_ of him staring at her.

She falters in her step a few metres away from them and immediately freezes in horror. She had faltered, destroyed her confident image – does she keep on walking, pretending she never faltered? Or does she stay here and kinda pretend that yep, this is what she planned to do. Totally.

In the moment it takes for her to contemplate, a blush has flamed up – she can feel it creeping up her neck to the tips of the ears. Guess she'll just stand here then.

She stares at Akatsuki and Akatsuki stares at her. Awkward. Then Itachi, seeming to take the initiative considering he knows her best, pushes himself off the floor and begins a steady walk towards her.

Sakura swallows nervously, Ino's words ringing through her mind – _trouble. Trouble. Trouble. God she's in so much trouble._

By now Sasuke's crazy _(but totally hot)_ older brother – thanks Ino for putting that in her head – is practically a metre away from her and doesn't look like he's planning to stop. So Sakura does the only thing she can think of.

She raises a hand up to stop him, but then the tray tips precariously and slips off her other hand. The whole thing looks like it's happening in slow motion and Sakura has a rare moment of internal swearing – Aunt Honoka's cupcakes! – but then Itachi's hand shoots out and snatches the tray before it can hit the ground. A few of her cupcakes slide over each other, knocking the cherries down, but overall, they're intact.

Belatedly, Sakura realises that her hand is still in the air so she tries to pass it off as a wave.

"Heey," she says awkwardly. Itachi stares at her measuredly. "Uh… thanks," she adds, nodding towards the cupcakes.

Itachi continues to stare at her.

"They're, uh, for you."

Itachi looks down at the pink and green cupcakes – with cherries on top – and then back up at her. He opens his mouth to respond but suddenly Sakura realises how it must look.

"Oh no wait!" she interrupts quickly. "Not for you – I mean, they _are_ for you – but not like a confession - I mean, you're a nice guy I'm sure but I really don't see you that way - wait. No. What I meant when I said you was you as in," she desperately waves her arms in the direction of the rest of Akatsuki. The guy with the orange hair raises an eyebrow – which is also orange – and Deidara does a weird wave back. Is he mocking her awkward wave or is he just strange? And Sakura knows she's an awkward waver okay he doesn't need to point it out. Better contemplating Deidara than friggin Uchiha Itachi though.

Gosh. This is embarrassing. But Sakura keeps smiling nervously because she's _Haruno Sakura_ and she ain't going down 'cause of some embarrassment. Even if the guy is five years older and the brother of the love of her life.

Even if said guy is _still freaking not responding._

Finally, he opens his mouth and says – "You're Haruno Sakura."

Sakura's smile drops.

"You're kidding," she says flatly. "I say _all_ of that, go through _all of that_ to make you all _pink and green cupcakes – Auntie Honoka's cupcakes! –_ to, let me tell you, the disapproval of my best friend, my _best friend_ Uchiha Itachi, and I don't know about you guys but we girls have a _sisterhood_ and we don't go and do things against said sisterhood like _lie to your best friend to make cupcakes for Akatsuki_ and _that's_ all you have to say?"

Silence.

Deidara's jaw is hanging open. The dude with orange hair is watching with rapt fascination, cigarette hanging limply. The other guy is still sharpening his knife. Parents who had taken their little boy to the skate park pull him away back into their car and drive off. Sakura imagines digging a whole to the centre of earth, diving into it, and never resurfacing.

But then, the corner of Uchiha Itachi's lips quirk up into a small smile.

And Sakura realises that she's screwed for two reasons.

Reason 1: She has just broken the Haruno _code!_ Her mother had raised her to be _polite,_ and _respectful,_ and a perfect lady thank you very much and then she goes and says something like that? Raised her voice to an _elder?_

Reason 2: Uchiha Itachi just smiled. As in the infamous ice cube Uchiha. As in Uchiha _flipping_ Itachi yes that's right _that_ Uchiha.

"I can assure you," Uchiha Itachi finally says, "that we do not have a sisterhood. It is, in fact, more of a brotherhood."

Sakura's eyebrow twitches. She can feel Inner raging inside for the first time in a _long_ time.

"Do you have a problem, Uchiha Itachi?" she asks instead, putting her hands on her hips. Hey, she's already broken the code, there's nothing left of her reputation to save anymore. "Because someone has just taken the time to bake you cupcakes and you should be _much_ more appreciative."

The other corner of his lips quirk up and by now yes Sakura can confirm the ice cube is actually _smiling._

"I'm sorry," he apologises smoothly, and Sakura thinks she's about to have a heart attack because the ice cube smiling _and_ apologising in the span of a minute is too much for her to bear. "My mother raised me with better manners and you were quite right to call me out."

This time it's Sakura's jaw that's hanging open. She wishes for the clinical detachment of that Akatsuki who's just sitting in the corner sharpening his knife, completely detached to his surroundings.

"No need to look surprised," Itachi says wryly. "And though I'm sure we've been acquainted before, let me introduce myself properly. My name is Uchiha Itachi."

He holds out one hand, balancing the tray perfectly on his other hand – something that Sakura hadn't managed to do. She scowls and eyes his hand. This is the hand that used to feed Sasuke milk in a bottle and change his diapers and- okay stop. She does not want to go there.

Itachi quirks an eyebrow and Sakura realises that she's left him hanging because his hand is still in the air. Oops.

"Sorry," she says quickly, grasping his hand. "I was just thinking about how you must've changed Sasuke's diapers when he was a kid and stuff and _wow_ you did not need to know that sorry. But yeah, I'm Haruno Sakura. You already knew that."

Itachi eyes her, a strange gleam in his eyes, and again Sakura prides herself on not wilting under his stare.

He shakes her hand with a firm grip, and then he laughs.

And yep, Sakura is definitely having a heart attack. Smiling was okay. She could deal with that. And then apologising? Well, Sakura's made out of tough stuff. But then _laughing_ as well?

Just being with Uchiha Itachi will force her to be badass out of self-preservation, no training needed.

* * *

 **AN:** There we go, first chap finished :) It's not going to be a long fic, probably only a few chaps, but we'll see. I was going to make it a oneshot but I didn't think what I'd had planned would all fit. Plus, this way I can explore more stuff, like why Sakura wants to be badass, the AU verse. Hopefully Sakura's not too OOC - I wanted to make her strong but without all the death stuff in canon, I feel like she'd have kept some of her old traits.

Please let me know what you think? Like I said, it's my first time writing in this style and hopefully it worked. Cheers x


	2. Pistachio Ploy and Ambulance Boy

**AN:** Second update! Another little fun one, may get serious a bit later on, just kind of taking it as I go.

Hope you all enjoy xx

* * *

 **Pistachio Ploy and Ambulance Boy**

There are both positives and negatives to sitting with Akatsuki at the skate park. And because Sakura is a person who likes making lists, especially when she's feeling nervous – and come on she's sitting with Akatsuki nerves are pretty much guaranteed – Sakura is going to make a list.

Positives:

1\. Sakura already seems badass by association.

And… that's pretty much it. So it's not even a list per say, as a list would imply, well, more than one, but-

The negatives are definitely a list:

1\. They could possibly kill her in this skate park since it's not as public as she'd imagined – parents coming here with their kids have been turning away at the sight of the one Akatsuki dude sharpening his knife, despite Sakura's best attempts to smile at them.

2\. WHAT IF THEY HATE HER CUPCAKES.

3\. THE CONSEQUENCES OF NO. 2

Because Akatsuki have been munching on them for a good five minutes and no one has said anything. Nothing. Zilch.

Which on one hand is probably good, like, at least they're not planning her murder. But they're Akatsuki, they probably don't need to vocalise their murder plans. Maybe they have heaps written up already for situations like these and they just signal to each other or something and they attack?

"You look scared," Itachi observes calmly.

Sakura just lets out a strained sigh. She supposes she should get used to the older Uchiha saying annoying things.

"I'm not," she says, trying to shrug casually. 'Cause like, come on right, if she's going to be badass she's got to muster up the courage to at least look somewhat not scared.

In fact, she has yet to muster up the courage to actually _ask_ them what she came here to ask. But she should, and soon. Otherwise this would have been a completely useless endeavour. And of all things, Sakura is _not_ useless.

Just as she manages to brace herself enough to open her mouth, Deidara dies.

Well, he doesn't die. He just kind of falls down to the ground. Like, face first.

For a second, she sits there in shock. Is this a regular occurrence in Akatsuki? Is this a signal for something? _Is this a signal to start her murder?_

Pein – the orange haired dude with the piercings and the cigarette – stands up calmly and looks straight at her.

Mentally, Sakura says her prayers.

"Call emergency services," Pein instructs.

"What?" Sakura parrots blankly. Meanwhile, Deidara begins to stir – good signs, good signs.

"I see," Itachi nods sagely to Pein, but Sakura doesn't see _at all._ "There must have been pistachios in the mix. Deidara's severely allergic."

Sakura blinks.

Oh my god.

 _Oh my god._

"Call emergency services," Pein repeats calmly. And that dude is flipping tall and he's looking down at Sakura real menacingly and _damn_ she should have listened to Ino-

Wait.

What is she doing.

She's a flipping _doctor._

Well, close enough to one anyway.

"Hidan-san," she snaps, "Put your knife down for a second will you and call an ambulance? Uchiha-san, I need you to help me roll him over onto his side. I have to check his airways."

She's never dealt with allergic reactions before and though she's read a bit on them, she's never come across anyone like Deidara's case – just lying there limply.

Itachi helps her to roll him over onto his side into the recovery position and Sakura places her head against Deidara's ribcage, feeling for the rise and fall of his chest.

"He doesn't have anything to help with his allergies does he? I assume you'd have pulled it out by now if he did."

As expected, Pein shakes his head. There's nothing much more she can do until the ambulance gets here so she continues to monitor his breathing, making sure his passage ways are all clear. He's got a bit of a bloody nose from his fall down but apart from wiping some blood off Sakura doesn't do much else in fear of blocking his breathing.

"This happen often?" she asks clinically.

"No," Itachi replies smoothly. "This is only the second time. We're usually very careful and not many people now – it is a weakness enemies can exploit. We have many enemies."

That's right. She'd forgotten.

Yet… here she is with an unconscious Akatsuki member whom she had, inadvertently, tried to kill.

"Oh my," Sakura whispers to herself. She had been so worried about _her_ being killed and now here she was, killing Deidara.

"I didn't mean to – this wasn't an assassination attempt," Sakura backtracks immediately, "I swear I had no idea. I mean, I don't support criminal activities – not that I'm accusing you of anything. 'Cause that would be real stupid of me. And I'm not stupid. Right. But yeah, I mean, Itachi-san's related to Sasuke-kun who's connected to me and 'cause he's connected to you harming you would be kinda like harming me. And who wants to harm themselves right? Well, maybe some, but the point is – you can trust me. Don't kill me?"

She looks up at them – because surprise surprise they're all taller than her – and unleashes the biggest puppy dog eyes she can muster. Her father used to cave every time she did so, but it seems to be a bit different with Akatsuki.

Hidan simply takes out his knife again and ignores her. Pein takes his cigarette out of his mouth and exhales slowly, expelling a long, thin smoke cloud into her face. Sakura steels herself and stops breathing for the moment in order to prevent herself from coughing like an un-badass person. Instead, she chooses to take his smoke cloud as the precursor for some great speech in response to her dramatic monologue.

But instead, Itachi says – "You're a doctor."

 _No shit Sherlock_ is the first thing that pops into her head but she has more restraint than that.

"Yes," Sakura says instead, because she's cool like that. "And while I'm not a certified doctor, I've been shadowing Tsunade-shishou around the hospital."

"Tsunade," Pein murmurs, "I know her."

Sakura whirls on him in surprise. Legendary Tsunade-sama – descendent of the elite Senju, would-be millionaire if not for her gambling – knows some lowlife crim from _Akatsuki?_ Then again, maybe she met him gambling.

Pein chuckles at her surprised expression. "Not personally, but we are both well-acquainted with one of her old colleagues." Pein's eyes slide over to Itachi at this – an action that Sakura doesn't miss.

"Orochimaru," she announces. And by the minute tick of Itachi's eyebrow, she smirks – she's _right._

She can start to hear the ambulance sirens in the background and it's only been four minutes – Konoha's emergency services department seems to be improving. Their old system had taken so long that by the time most people got to the hospital Tsunade-shishou had a train wreck on her hands. Sometimes literally.

"How did you know?" Pein asks curiously. Or as curiously as his stone face will allow. Well whatever – it's a score for Sakura. The badass Akatsuki dude seems slightly impressed with her and that in itself raises her badassery by quite a few points she reckons.

"You glanced at him when you said it," Sakura says, cocking her head towards the elder Uchiha, "And I'm Sasuke's best friend so I know a bit about what's going on in the deep dark Uchiha lair" -Hidan looks up at this to give her his most doubtful expression- "and I know that Orochimaru-sama, Tsunade's old research partner who was shamed in the scientific community for violating moral procedures, had turned to the Uchiha for private funding once he stopped receiving government funds. He's taken quite an interest in the Uchiha heirs and since Itachi-san's yours, I assumed."

Before Pein can respond, Itachi steps forward slightly – not too much to be awkward, but just enough to be intimidating.

"Uchiha _heir,"_ he corrects quietly, looking down at her through his long hair.

"No," Sakura bristles, for once her inner self seeping slightly through as she straightens her back and glares right back at him, unafraid. "Uchiha _heirs._ That's right Itachi-san – after _you_ went off, you transferred your little slippery problem to Sasuke-kun."

For a second Itachi says nothing. Then he leans back.

"My little slippery problem," he repeats flatly.

Thankfully, Sakura's prevented from bashing her skull in by the arrival of the ambulance.

"Took them long enough," Sakura snaps, only to feel guilty immediately afterwards because she'd completely forgotten about the prone Deidara at her feet. The ambulance officers rush into the skate park with a stretcher and Sakura even recognises a few from the hospital.

"Kabuto-san," she greets with a smile. Kabuto's probably the person closest to her age at the hospital, and it's nice having someone around who actually understands technology. "I didn't know you were on ambulance duty."

Kabuto shrugs bashfully. "I thought I'd try it out for a bit, you know? Hospital shifts can be a bit hectic."

Sakura raises an eyebrow. "And… this isn't?"

"Sakura," Itachi cuts in sharply, and _excuse me_ when did she give him permission to call her that- but then it gets worse.

 _Because he puts his hand on her shoulder._

A few years back, twelve year old Sakura would have been squealing. Because Uchiha Itachi, especially seventeen year old Uchiha Itachi, had been _very_ cute. You know, the way cats are cute until you get a bit too close and then they jump up with their claws and try to maul your eyes out.

Just like Uchiha cats. Just like Uchiha _Itachi._

Twelve year old Sakura would have been like – yay, maybe he likes me.

But sixteen year old Sakura is instead like – I know where one of his hands are where's the other one is he holding a knife or what.

Does he even wash his hands? What if she has the blood of hundreds on her shoulder right now?!

"Do I know you?" Kabuto finally says. Yeah. What's Itachi doing intimidating Kabuto? The boy may be talented for sure, but he's still a new recruit. Itachi needs to learn to be a bit more delicate and, well, less murderous in his dealings.

"I'm sorry," Itachi replies smoothly, not sounding sorry at all. "But something's just come up. Deidara can't come with you. You can leave."

Sakura whirls on him.

"Um," she says, sticking her finger out at his chest. "Are you blind? Deidara is lying there, kissing the floor, with some unknown allergic reaction, and you're saying, let's _tell all the paramedics to leave?_ He could die! Do you have hundreds of members in stock or something? Is he that replaceable? Because I'm sure he would be offended. In fact, I'm offended on his behalf."

"I'm sure Deidara would be very honoured," Itachi simply says flatly. Then suddenly – and god knows how he got it, he reaches out with his other hand – _she knew he had a weapon there! –_ and shoves a _cupcake_ in her mouth.

"Mmph," Sakura manages to say, and then he grabs her with both hands, spins her around, and drags her away.

And Sakura starts regretting dressing pretty because all this being dragged around is _not_ good for her shoes and she has half a mind to swear at the self-entitled Uchiha. Except she can't, _duh,_ because she has a cupcake in her mouth. She kinda wants to spit it out and swear at him anyway except she had worked pretty hard on that cupcake thank you very much and it'd be a waste if it just went to the floor like that.

Finally he comes to a stop at the edge of the skate park. Sakura peers over his shoulder at where Pein has started talking to Kabuto before Itachi steps in front of her, blocking her view. What a douche. Douchey Itachi. Douchitachi. Haha.

She giggles, and the cupcakes falls out of her mouth onto Itachi's shoes.

"Oops," she says, but she smiles just to let him know she doesn't mean it.

For a second she breaks the Itachi mask – he narrows his eyes! – but it's back almost immediately.

"He can't go with them," Itachi says. Wow, cut to the chase much. "We need you to look after him. If you're shadowing Tsunade she sees something in you."

This is a chance to get closer to Akatsuki!

"Sure," she says immediately.

But then Itachi's eyes glint and she thinks that maybe she should have thought through that a bit more. Like, why did they not want him to go with the ambulance? Why do they want _her_ to look after him? She knows she's great and all, but Akatsuki needing her help was kinda a thing she'd ruled out as impossible.

"Good," Itachi says, and he smirks that threatening but really attractive little quirk of the lips with the small hint of steely white teeth. And Sakura kind of thinks that maybe she shouldn't have agreed, that maybe she should have asked for something in return, and that maybe this was all just a bad idea in general.

But then she sees the graffiti on the wall to the side – _Hebi Hebi Hebi_.

Sakura squares back her shoulders and looks him in the eye.

"Good," she says, and Itachi _smiles_.

* * *

 **AN:** Getting a bit into the action now! Thanks to all those who reviewed/faved/followed, hope you like it x


End file.
